“There is
something pleasurable in discovering a delicacy, that has been
overlooked, rather than extravagantly denied.” Exclaimed renowned
Bostonian food critic Clarence Farnsworthy, seated in one of the more
exclusive Manhattan Restaurant whilst preparing another review for
The New york Times.
Although food
critics usually traveled incognito, so as not to be duped like some
unsuspecting tourists, his companion on this excursion was his live
in girlfriend and literary assistant, Judith Cresler, a woman twenty
years younger to his sixty five, yet knowing that mature things give
back more in the long run, instead of the quick thrills sort by the
lesser Epicureans. However the evening was to be somewhat regrettable
yet again. For having enjoyed a fine meal with his companion of
Lobster Newburg
accompanied by a few glasses of Albarino from Gallicia in the
Northwest corner of Spain
Veal escalopes with
lemon and a garnish of sautéed potatoes, to which they drank a
glass of Rioja
and finishing with
Apple and Thyme Pastry Tarts with Cinnamon Ice cream. With that he
drank water and she orange juice.
The reason was to be
made clear as indeed was to be his disappointment yet again. For one
of his major passions was the delicacy “As he referred to it”
known as cheese. Clarence had a somewhat renowned knowledge of
cheese, that went well with his knowledge of wine. Especially Spanish
and Italian wines and his desire for strong cheeses, such as
Stilton, Cashel Blue, proper English Cheddar, and Casu Marsu. He
beckoned the Waiter, whom approached with an inquiring look, the
Restaurant itself was half full with various clientele, except for a
well dressed man seated in the alcove where he could watch and not be
seen. He studied the look on Clarence's face as a somewhat limited
cheese selection was placed in front of him and his companion, and it
was obvious by the disappointing look on Clarence's face that he was
hoping for something more elaborate, which the man was prepared to
offer. Seeing Clarence discard the somewhat limited and processed
selection, even the blue cheese that was merely coloured powdered to
effect. The man waited, until Clarence and his companion were about
to leave having settled the bill, then he approached and stated in a
somewhat refined English accent, though with compliant New Yorker.
“Excuse me, Your the food critic Clarence Farnsworthy-”
:Yes, but I'm with a
Colleague, so if you want a quick autograph I can oblige, however I'm
afraid I cannot stop and-”
“Oh no, you
misjudge me; I saw the way you correctly discarded the choice they
put before you. If you ask me, most Americans know as much about
cheese as they do about chocolate; Cheese is a delicacy, it has so
many flavours and textures and I believe I can be of assistance”
The man produced
what looked like an old crumpled map from his trouser pocket, as if
he wanted directions, however he pointed to a red circled spot on 5th
Avenue and explained that the place in question sold proper cheese
delicacies, including Casu Marzu.
“I heard your
choice of wines, I think you will find the cheeses there quite
Moorish.”
“Isn't Casu Mazu
banned? Inquired Judith, pleased at the chance to show her knowledge,
and prove that this was a partnership and more than a culinary one at
that, Because it-”
“Contains worms?
Said the ma., Yes, but as you probably know the place I refer to
merely looks like a discarded paint peeled maroon door. Resembling
some failed city project that no one investigates. There is a number
at the top, if you phone them I assure you they will be most
cooperative;
Clarence thought for
a moment then stated, “I don't want to find out that this is some
gimmicky processed cheese, popular on Halloween, with pieces of
mushroom, or Quark or whatever they use to represent living bacteria;
If it is, I will be disappointed!
“What have you got
to lose? If you don't like it leave.”
And being curious
about everything, especially food, Clarence and his companion.
Thanked the man in polite literal terms and set off.
To make certain of
no further disappointments, Clarence used his mobile to announce he
was arriving with his companion. An elderly distinguished sounding
man with a gentle American-british accent stated that they would be
expected. They were to announce their arrival for security reasons,
having already been asked to give their names, they had both complied
in doing so.
To be certain they
both took a Taxi, and after paying the driver tip included and he
thanked them before driving off. They both found their selves
standing in front of the maroon door that seemed to blend in with the
brickwork. The only part that had no graffiti. “As if it was
cleaned regularly to keep up appearance.” thought Clarence to
himself. There was no knocker or buzzer, so Clarence decided to phone
the man yet again, whom answered and on hearing whom they were went
and let them in, closing the door behind him as he did so.
The place had a
light woodish appearance concerning the walls. The floor was a dull
unpainted white consisting of easily noticeable floorboards. It was
as if they had stepped into an old decrepit house that had never been
painted, let alone started on. The man was somewhat roundish in
appearance and about five foot two wearing a white coat, red shirt
and black trousers. He had tufted white-ish hair, and his lined face
seemed to smile pleasantly as he announced: “How may I be of
assistance to you you both?”
“My name is
Clarence Farnsworthy, I'm a food critic, with a love of cheeses. I
was told you have some acceptable delicacies, and we were wondering
if we might discuss purchases?|
“And do you have
any particular cheeses, either of you are interested in?
“I was told you
may have Casu Marzu, though we would like to try some of your other
delicacies if we may?”
The man glanced at
the three wooden steps in the distance, leading to a slightly higher
level, where a warm light shone a yellowy glow as if this was
necessary.
“If you would both
care to follow me?” Stated the man.
They did so.
There were two
displays, or rather one, the first was the typical sanitised
appearance in cheese shops good, bad or indifferent, the other was
the kind kept behind the grey steel door with the somewhat dusty
glass,. Clarence tried to look inside, getting a glimpse of a
circular object that seemed to have white moving line,, “This he
told himself was where the best stuff was kept.”
“And where would
you both like to start?: Inquired the man, smiling pleasantly.
Perhaps with some cheddar or a little brie?
“Enjoy the starter
before the main, announced Clarence glancing at his companion. We'll
try some strong English cheddar, and then perhaps a little French
Brie.'
“And would you
both care for a glass of port? We have a fine selection on offer to
go with all types of cheese selections,?”
:It might be worth
trying, stated Judith, holding onto Clarence's arm as if they were
discussing an anniversary present, We are expecting some guests from
the Food Writers Guild and it doesn't hurt to impress.” She smiled
at the man as if to include him in the statement.
“Indeed it does
not. he stated, We have a rather nice Sousao, or would you prefer a
Tinta Roriz, both from the Douro Valley Portugal, that would blend
nicely with a mild blue, or even a soft Brie.”
Clarence thought for
a moment then inquired, again, “I was told you sell Casu Mazu, is
that correct, I mean it is banned in the States for obvious reasons.
Not that I'm implying anything you understand.”
“None taken Sir.
We did have some Casu Mazu, however our supply has not yet arrived,
for various reasons. I can however offer you a yet unnamed cheese,
that has a somewhat mild yet lingering after taste, somewhat similar
to Tante Moine from Sweden, though somewhat stronger in flavour.
It does also contain
Maggots, if that is what you desire?”
Clarence noticed the
dubious look on his companion's face as she clung tighter to him as
if fearing some unexplained event was about to occur.
“It's alright. He
reassured her with a glance, They are quite harmless. I've had
Pecorino and Casu Marzu many times on my travels.”
“I've only been
with you to certain regions, she stated, however if you both say it
is safe.”
“The acid in your
stomach kills them Madam. Stated the man, then seemed to whisper
softy, “Apparently.”
:Alright; she
stated.
“And the Port, a
Tinta Roriz perhaps? If your interested our cheapest prices range
from $25's to our most expensive at $70500's .”
“We'll both take a
glass; smiled Clarence, smiling at his companion in reassurance.
“I won't be a
moment Sir; Stated the man, opening the steel door with a rusty key
of many on a circular keychain, closing it loosely, and returning
with a somewhat runny circle that seemed to be leaking a pool of
lavae that smelt of rather strong odours, and could clearly be seen
incorporating while strands, wriggling as if inquisitive. The man
placed the mound of cheese on a wooden bench like table. The cheese
was on a clean white plater, although the ooze had somewhat
exaggerated parts of it's appearance. A cheese cutting knife was
already situated, the holes are to prevent the cheese sticking to the
blade and therefore prevent any unintentional effecting of it's
flavour.
They waited whilst
the man went to get two glasses of port and a small plate consisting
of four biscuits. When he returned he set the small silver tray with
the lattice pattern and it;'s contents on the table and prepared to
cut a piece of the cheese, Firstly for Judith to try.
“And where is this
cheese made?” Inquired Clarence.
“I'm not certain
Sir, confirmed the man, It's somewhere between Area 51 and parts of
The Yorkshire Triangle, Madam, he stared placing a piece on a
biscuit, if you would care to try?”
The worms seemed to
be entwined within the cheese, like amoebas coming out of a
primordial existence. She let her tongue first taste the firm
slightly hardened texture, then the runny melting companion, as she
felt the gelatinous flesh sliding onto her tongue, she took a small
bite and immediately felt a somewhat euphoric reaction within her
brain, combined with the lingering yet pleasing nutty texture. There
was a somewhat moist flesh like taste of the maggots, with traces of
well cooked meat, or so she would have described it.
They both waited in
anticipation of her reaction, and were equally pleased when smiling
to herself she took another bite. At which point with already
perceived intentions Clarence decided to join her.
They settled on a
package of the unknown cheese and two bottles of Tinta Roriz, as well
as some English Stilton, some French ripened Camembert, Italian
Taleggio, a slice of Vermont Bonne Bouche, a piece of Dehesa De Los
Llanos from Spain as well as a Cabrales, and a mild Garotxa
Cantalonia all three from Spain. The cheeses and Ports had been
neatly packaged and they had each been given a leaflet advertising
popular choices for holidays such as Christmas, with a 10% discount
off a rare bottle of Paxron and Whitfield Tawny Port, said to go
well with Stilton or even a good Tetilla from Spain, excellent for
dessert with it's lemon texture. Effective for a citrus pairing of
Christmas flavours.
Whilst in their
somewhat lavish apartment in the more high priced secluded area of
New York 42cnd Street. Clarence set about unpacking, whilst Judith
was instantly on the phone to her gourmet friends as she referred to
them, though only to Clarence and by means of hierarchical
importance, Explaining what had happened and longing to see them for
another dinner party.
It was whilst
talking to a woman named Claire that Judith felt the insatiable urge
to take another bite of the unknown cheese. And seeing it was
unpackaged proceeded to do so. Clarence did not seem to mind, in fact
he was rather pleased that she was taking such an interest.
He smiled as she
took a piece, and eating it went back to the phone, apologising and
regaining the conversation. Whilst Clarence continued with his
unpacking.
It was getting
somewhat late, and having already eaten at the Restaurant, they
decided to relax in the comfort of their home. after Clarence had put
the cheeses and Ports away. He had placed the unknown cheese in a
separate plastic container within the fridge at the warmest part, to
keep fresh so that the worms would not go off. Since they had to
remain fresh to preserve the taste. Now he was looking forward to
taking Judith with him, on his next visit to Italy and impressing
her. She was very attractive and he had been afraid of losing her
company, since other men had been paying an interest in her, and he
had been worried she was finding his excursions into the world of
food somewhat mundane. Now as he watched her leave to enter the
kitchen, he knew like him, she was a true Affineur, a lover of
cheeses. He slumped back in the armchair whilst she proceeded to make
two cups of English tea, and considered booking a flight to Italy for
both of them as a surprise, since it was coming up to her birthday
and he wanted to keep her occupied so to speak.
At about 1030 Judith
exclaimed that she was feeling tired and that she was going to bed.
Clarence said he'd be up soon, “After watching the news. Probably
all that Port and cheese; he smiled, I feel a bit tired myself.” He
watched her leave. He thought he heard her in the kitchen, however he
ignored this, since Judith always liked to snack, and the cheese was
indeed some of the best he'd ever tasted, He decided at about 11.07
to check for himself. By then Judith was already in bed, and on
entering the kitchen, he decided to see what she had consumed. He
took out the container and on opening it, noticed it had become more
runny, it seemed to contain lavae, that was somehow integrated along
with the cheese itself and the maggots, it was as if the cheese had
the same connection to the worms as eggs to a chicken or milk to a
cow, as if they were producing the cheese their selves. He dismissed
this, assuming the cheese had just gotten more runny, “Probably due
to the fridge temperature being messed up or something.” he
muttered, helping himself to a runny piece before putting back the
container and tightly securing the lid. He then got undressed in the
bedroom where his pajamas were kept on his side, and got into bed. He
kissed Judith on the face, even though she did not stir, then he too
fell asleep. He was somewhat disturbed in the middle of the night by
Judith getting up, He checked the alarm clock noticing it was 3:13
and assumed she was going to the bathroom. Instinctively he turned on
the table lamp that was on her side, even though he too liked to
read, and noticed there was a tiny drop of blood,
“Judith, are you
alright? he inquired, have you been cleaning your teeth too hard
again?
He got out of bed
and decided to talk to her in what he assumed would be the bathroom,
however she was not there. Noticing the light from the kitchen he
went to find out if she was alright, perhaps she was getting a glass
of water to wash out the blood. She was holding the carton of cheese,
he noticed she seemed to be consuming it's contents as if she was
addicted. She did not notice him approach, he tapped her on the
shoulder and called out her name,
Instinctively as
if startled she seemed to drop the container and he thought he heard
tiny voices state, “Leave us alone”
“Clarence?” she
muttered as if she was unaware of her surroundings.
He stared at the
runny contents that now oozed on the floor, the maggots crawling
through the cheese lava, though now there was stripes of red, he
turned to Judith, whom was now becoming tired. “We need to get you
back to bed.” he stated, taking her arm with both his in order to
guide her. He would get rid of the container afterwards, he would
wash out its contents and flush it down the toilet. “Perhaps I am
over reacting; he told himself, as he got her back in their bed,
however it's best to be on the safe side,”
Clarence decided to
keep on the lamp light, so he could watch Judith and make certain she
was alright. “Maybe it was her gums bleeding because she had rubbed
them too hard? He told himself, maybe I did imagine the voices;
However he decided he would throw away the cheese, “And then what?
he inquired to himself as he went into the kitchen, the larvae seemed
to have increased, he went to get some kitchen roll to scoop it up
back into its container,, then taking it over to the sink he began to
fill it with water in order to destroy its contents. Quickly before
anything he assumed could happen he took it into the toilet and
poured the contents down the pan, the sound of the chain pulling now
seemed in unison with Judith's coughing and what sounded like
spluttering. Clarence dropped the now empty container. Rushing in to
see what was occurring. He then noticed that blood was on the sheets.
Judith had been sick violently, and not only that, she seemed
somewhat dazed, as if her body was responding automatically, whilst
her mind was not.
“Judith, he called
going over to her and noticing the blood soaked worms and larvae that
was crawling out of her mouth, Oh God. I'm going to call an
ambulance! Judith can you hear me? I'm going to get help”
Going into the
passage where a telephone was kept on a brown oaken one legged table
with a white lattice cloth for decoration, Clarence picked it up and
dialed 911. The Operator a woman, inquired of the emergency and he
stated:
“I need an
ambulance, it's my girlfriend, she's eaten some cheese, she's being
sick;
:It's probably mild
food poisoning; They are very busy at this time of night, however I
will put you through, Hold on please.”
Clarence waited for
what seemed like ages, the only sounds being the ringing of the
tele[hone and Judith's coughing and vomiting in unison. He became
concerned that she was losing too much blood and that very soon she
would hemorrhage! It was then he heard a man's voice state:
“Ambulance, what
seems to be the problem?”
“It's my
girlfriend she's eaten some cheese and now she can't stop vomiting,
she's bringing up blood and she has maggots coming out of her mouth;
There was a pause
then the man stated:
“Sir, we are very
busy. We do not have time for this sort of thing, we have serious
cases to deal with.”
“This is serious,
for goodness sake; I am not making this up! Please you must come I
think they're aliens.”
The phone went
silent.
“Hello, hello are
you still there? “Idiot.” shouted Clarence slamming the phone
down in frustration. He ran into the bedroom. Judith was now on the
floor. She was laying on her back and the blood had now become a
trickle, yet her eyes had turned a dark galaxy black without the
stars, and the worms were still crawling out of her mouth.
Clarence helped her
up by placing an arm around his shoulder and taking the unconscious
Judith into the kitchen, where instinctively he began to mix salt
water, forcing it down her throat in order to make her sick and
destroy the maggots. He was trying to get her to drink the liquid as
she kept coughing, some of the larvae and their adult species had
dropped onto the floor, yet the salt water was also coming out too
quick. Clarence knew he needed to try something else. He sat her on
the chair, her body still slumped and unconscious, whilst he
contemplated making some coffee. He noticed that now they were
dropping out of her mouth, yet he knew it was not yet over. He needed
to get help.
“Judith, I won't
be a minute; he stated, I'm going to phone some of our friends, they
can help us.”
He then added that
he was putting the kettle on, and poured some coffee via five
spoonfuls into a large cup, in the hope it would revive her because
of it's strong contents. Then he went into the Dining Room in order
to dial, two men and a woman whom were also renowned food critics
and close friends of him and Judith. Their names were, Jack, Toby,
and Amelia, who is American English. Her Mother is a Newspaper Editor
for a upperclass food magazine in London and her Father an American
Businessman who owns a Catering Service. It was Amelia whom answered
since he had dialed her first, and after explaining clearly what was
occurring, he heard her say she was coming round and that she would
bring the others as he had requested.
“It's going to be
alright?” she reassured him, go see how Judith is.”
On hearing the
kettle click, he went into the kitchen and poured some strong black
coffee before putting back the kettle. He then went over to Judith
and seeing her mouth conveniently open, forced her head back and
began to pour in the coffee. She still spluttered yet at least it was
going in, and some of it was remaining. He put down the cup and
placing his arm around her shoulder began walking her round, talking
all the time about things they had done as a couple and places they
had been too. He kept asking her questions about places and things as
if trying to get her to respond to his questions. She was mumbling
and he was certain he could hear the tiny voices, yet some of them
were becoming fainter. It was then he heard two cars drive up.
“They've arrived.
Judith our friends are here; You stay on the chair I'm going to let
them in.”
He slumped her on
the chair and rushed to open the door. Jack and Toby stood there with
their wives and Amelia with her husband, they were all dressed as if
they had just returned from a dinner party, the men in suits and
ties, the women in blue dresses.
“What's going on?”
He inquired, have you all been somewhere?”
“They've been to
the cheese shop.” he heard a voice state.
Clarence turned to
see Judith standing there, the blood had stopped dripping from her
mouth, yet her eyes were galaxy black without the stars. She was
moving towards him automatically.
Instinctively he
turned to the others, their eyes were the same.
“Judith told us
all about the cheese shop.” said Jack, as Judith grabbed him round
the neck, her strength having increased as if by some extra
terrestrial force. We'd like you to sample some with us,” continued
Jack. I have some in my car. Running a catering business, I believe I
can put it to good use.
Clarence began to
struggle, as Toby and Amelia grabbed his arms holding them with both
their hands as if on a warped date. They all began to drag him,
literarily kicking and trying to scream as Judith tightened her grip
around his neck, causing him to slump, When he awoke he found himself
seated in a chair at the head of the Dining Table. They were forcing
his mouth open, and Jack was presenting the cheese on a silver
platter, the maggots were breeding in front of him and now Jack was
forcing the cheese into his mouth. He could hear them saying you will
soon be one of us, and as he adapted to the taste, he could hear
their voices inside his head, explaining why.
The End
